18
April
April
80 Channels of Nothing
No comments Posted in: UncategorizedTagged with boracay, entertainment, technology
I like television. Really, I do. I don’t know why this seems odd to people; they ask why I like here and stay inside all day watching TV. Its simple: don’t have to be in the oppressive humidity of outside, don’t have to wear pants, start drinking in the morning w/o alcoholic gossip – I don’t even have to be around other people! What more can a person ask for?
(I unblocked the local and god channels just for this)
Its a huge list— click to see it . . . .
- Teleradio: because watching the DJ fail at changing the printer cartridge is entertainment for the whole family.
- Myx2:Pinoy music videos
- Music station: infomertials about a Fiber Festival – the pictures say clothing – but the wording suggests colon cleansing.
- Station 23 music videos: the song is in english, so are the subtitles. Worst part? The subtitles arent correct!
- Mtv: Local bands re-making popular songs that are still chart-toppers. (isn’t there some protocol to wait like 5 years before copying someone elses songs to re-make? and even then, if you’re copying it word-for-word… you always give credit in the songtitle?)
- CNN: making the news seem like everything wrong in the world is Americas fault
- FOX News: making everything wrong in the world seem like its CNN’s fault
- BBC News: A story making Palestinian civilians seem like angels . -a little Palestinian girl throw a rock at the Israeli immigration/customs point. Excuse me… somebody forgot to shoot her in the face.
- NewsAsia: scrolling text highlights of sports, because sports are important.
- Net25: show on how to use company resourses for free communication rather than pay at home.
- ANC News: Video of about 200 milkfish/bangus getting cooked across a parking lot – I feel ill just thinking about that smell.
- Bloomberg: midget porn (just kidding, its business news as usual haha!)
- AlJazeera: as if I can understand. Usually I keep it blocked
- TVMonde: french news, in french.. I think.
- ABC Today show: using Google to find family members (…which has been common for a decade now)
- CCTV 9: European food report by a Chinese reporter speaking English and re-translated into Chinese
- reItalia: Italian TV series involving guys with more chest hair than the 1970′s had
- Chinese something: news
- ariang: Korean fashion news
- RT: World news from a Russian perspective which seems to be that everyone west is bad, English language
- NHK: Hong Kong news in English
- Discovery: police interrogation re-enactment. It’s not entertaining in real-life, why bother re-enacting it?
- Nat Geographic: a certain period about the Great Wall
- Animal Planet: Groomer Has It – does the world absolutely need a reality-show about people with such low self-esteem their highest goal is to be a pet groomer?
- Nat Geo Adventure: Australians traveling in the Jordanian desert…because their deserts are better than Australian deserts?
- Travel and Living: Globe Trekker guy in Ireland. Stop riding the bike and get drunk already!
- HBO: Headless Horseman (only good because of Johnny Depp. Everything’s better with a touch of Johnny Depp, even Mondays.)
- Cinemax: hour-long making of about the movie coming on next; to hell with anticipation.
- Hallmark: movie – girl becomes victim, girl escapes, girl becomes hero and all men in the world are horrible.
- Star Movies: something from 70′s, everyone’s wearing thin leather jackets.
- StarWorld: Psyche, semi funny episode.
- MM1 (MNet): 11th hour (2008) Leonardo DaCaprio (because nobody really takes Al Gore seriously anyway)
- MM2 (Mnet): 10 Items or Less, Morgan Freeman. I cant change the channel fast enough.
- MEast (MNet): made-for -TV movie….. but not my TV.
- 2nd Ave/RJ: something boring about adults trying to make a garage band work
- HollyWood: Something with lots of dead people – I watch this channel a lot.
- AXN: Slam-Ball – watching this make me feel dumber.
- ETC: Snoops Father Hood
- FTV: unattractive, flat chested, drug-addict looking girls wearing embarrassing clothing.
- Jack TV: wrestling
- let me be perfectly clear about this… this is the lowest-class programming in the world, except for religious channels.
- CinemaOne: high school show about boy-meets-girl. Looks like the student got the teacher pregnant. mixed Tagalog and English.
- Boracay Channel: same annoying loud and crappy video advertisements as always
- Disney Kids: Sesame street (Grover is still on meth)
- CN: PowerPuff Girls
- Nickelodeon: multi-ethnic social engineering cartoon to get kids never say mean things to each other.
- Disney: no idea, but its retarded.
- Animax: another anime that looks exactly like anime’s did 20 years ago… with possibly the same storyboard.
- Australia Network: I have no idea – honestly, it takes me a half hour before I can ever figure what the story is about.
- VOA: Ya know, Voice of America is just like AFN… they are run by social outcasts that end up making Americans look stupid. Like that fucktard DJ in Good Morning Vietnam that wanted to play polka music all the time.
- Lifetime: Kevin Costner movie, something akin to Little House on the Prarie
- NOW: car racing 60 years ago; because Grampa Jones still thinks he should have won that bet in 1942
- tVe: Spanish channel, a guy in womens summer-blouse and gloves with a blond wig. wearing a laurel on his head and rubbing his nipple. wtf?
- Chinese something: really, I have no idea what they’re saying.
- CCTV 4: Chinese stage comedy
- GEM tv: Chinese chef teaches kids about different tastes… apparently bitter and sour are not the same; who knew?
- DM Digital: Indian Bollywood stuff. I know it looks like it was made 40 years ago, but this is the stuff they put out today.
- Indian channel: not in any language I can read or understand – looks like a call-in psychic friends network
- unknown -Malaysian?: no clue
- S1: Golf
- S2: sports interviews in Australia
- S3: football/soccer
- S5: rugby
- S6: cricket
- ESPN: Yankees Baseball – (do people still watch this sport?)
- Star Sports: videogame reviews
- Solar Sports: golf (does it matter where or who?)
- Basketball channel: B-ball, what else? (local teams)
- a Pinoy educational call-in show: offering phone-load prizes for solving an english-word-scramble– except the answers aren’t real words. “coz” is not a word.
- Karaoke channel: Tagalog. when did this channel get here? Will it please go away?
- Viva Prime: local music videos
(people are free to believe whatever they want, but this is overkill with all the TV stations)
- EWTN: church service video of Americans, because sometimes we like to watch crackers on the other side of the world like Diane Bish talk about why we need to send more money.
- NBN: religious. discussion in Tagalog, bible verses in English
- Sounds of Worship: a christian declaring his religion to be the only one and his people are the only children of god, the chosen ones; …ummm…. . Filipino cast/crowd. English language.
- unTv: 24 hours of Christianity in Tagalog
- MiracleNet: Hispanic salvation works better with unused red bongos on the stage in the background
- Trinity Broadcasting Network: American children’s god-programming. Aren’t there child-endangerment laws in the US preventing this kind of stuff?
- GOD TV: no kidding, the channels name is GOD. In the top right corner, it constantly says GOD.
- 3ABN: another American 24/hr god channel for people that don’t feel like thinking for them selves.
- Smile of a Child: 24 hours of god, English
4 Responses
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Yea, it rained hard today, I tried taking some hi-res pics of the pour off but my back was jacked up so I couldnt stay out very long. Started before noon, light patter patter, then a roaring downpour. It’s been on and off for a while tonight although only lite rain.
The bad part is it was hot as hell! My landlord never uses her aircon and even she was overheated and sweating. Before I talked to her, I thought it was just me from getting hammered last night.
Apr 20, 2009 at 11:28 PM -
plus, its well appreciated you actually do what u wanna do… some people say this person say bad things about himself or herself, but they still try to hang out with those people who practically backbite them…. couldnt get the upfront hypocrisy…. oh i forgot to ask, has it been raining in bora?
Apr 20, 2009 at 11:12 PM -
i am also addicted to tv
Apr 20, 2009 at 10:25 PM
im glad aint alone with that hobby plus plus, its so true with the ‘without the gossip alcohol thing’ ….
same here, raining bloody crazy but humid as hell….
Apr 21, 2009 at 12:40 AM