Homeless Diver

I have to ask this because I’ve not left the house much in a few days. A few hours at Cocoloco’s and at Red Pirates…some of which I remember, but other than that its been time spent in the aircon. Now it looks like the night will be wasted again trying to fix a cell phone whose updates broke the link to the PC.

Before, I had a good excuse: my leg. Now its become pure laziness.

Sleep all day, wake after sunset. It’s a good thing there’s a rather large supply of rum in the kitchen. Tanduay to the rescue.

I hadn’t known this but it seems Samuel Adams (Boston Beer Company) beer had tried to shut down a website for a mayoral candidate in Portland, Oregon. His name was Samuel Adams and it was reflected in the domain name.

Well, there’s a friend of mine that I met thru his visits to Boracay - his name is also Sam Adams and he has a nicely written note about the whole affair over on his blog: http://samueladamsblog.com/wp-trackback.php?p=3

… So here is my little protest- my little Tea Party if you will- against those tyrants who would deprive me of my right to life, liberty and the pursuit of registering my own domain name. And they can stick their cease and desist letter up their %*$.”

Be sure to read the whole thing..its pretty good.

I truly hate the dog shit out of this island. I hate the fair-weather friends. I hate the foreigners. I hate the water. I hate the sun. i hate the insane amount of prostitutes on this island. i hate people ruining the atmosphere of established bars because they have no fucking class. i hate the humidity. i hate bartenders padding my bill. i hate paying more because im white. i hate scummy people.  i hate not being able to go anywhere or do anything w/o every mother fucker on the island knowing about it. i hate people getting into my shit. i hate people talking shit about me when ive been level with them. fuck em.

Im gonna find me a baseball bat. wooden. i really hate this fucking place. fuck this place.

I hate liers. I hate them. I especially hate the godloving fuck out of people trying to get money from me they’re not owed. i hate brown outs. again, i hate the police that let gaggles of whores and fags-for-hire harass tourists. i have the muslim vendors association. i hate the media and government making this place out to be some paradise its not. i hate tanduay but i still drink it…i hate that. i hate the cats getting into my house.

i really, really do not like boracay right now.

There is no such thing as privacy on Boracay. It doesn’t matter if you need it or not…every fucking person on this shit hole talks about shit they have no clue about. Ever play the circle-talk-rumor- game? 1st person starts with a sentence and each person whispers it into the ear of the person on their side - until it gets back to the original person. Almost always, in non-institutional areas (military, jail) the idea becomes garbled and different from the original….thus making a false rumor. But here on Boracay, its like the 1st person exclaiming there is no wind….but the second person relays a 20 minute speech on the evils of pull-tab soda cans.

Exactly! It has nothing to do with the truth and only took 1 person. Imagine when its like that thru 200 such people? To that end, it is NOT true that what happens on Boracay, stays on Boracay…or even shit that didn’t happen.

Example: I was in Manila recently and a lot of the Boracay group gathered for one last night-out with a month-long visitor. I arrived with her and nothing more. I did not sit next to her. I did not chill with her. Little conversation, very little. I did not buy her drinks. A person could have stared at me all night and never have any reason to think we were a couple or even friends. It was a group with about 15 eople.

But I come back to Boracay and this bartender (that I hardly see) congratulates me on getting engaged with my manila girlfriend. ———— What the Fuck!?!?!

He clamms up and acts like he doesnt speak english anymore. But it didnt stop there. Several girls found out about me being back and started texting.  A few mentioned my Manila girlfriend. I ignored it until the bartender had mentioned it. Then, last night, I got a text from a girl about my girlfriend in Manila. I have to go thru 15 text messages and she still wont tell me what the hell she’s talking about….. then I remember ……. she was there in Hard Rock cafe that night in Manila. She’s also the ONLY person in that group that lives on Boracay now aside from myself. She was the guest of another person in the group…yea <no name> you know who I’m talking about.

Enlightenment dawns on me… but still, the shit just got real. It was bad enough to find a lot of my friends thinking I was a transvestite during my absence, (must be a pretty damn poor one), but now this HO simply saw me walk into a Manila bar within a few minutes of a Manila girl, and nothing else, but decided to open her cock-holster to tell people on Boracay who-knows-what that ends up with me being engaged to the girlfriend of one of my buddies? What The Holy FUCK, over?

Now, as I’m writing this I was also texting a good friend on mine. She tells me that someone had told her I was admittedly gay - WAAAY back in the day..probably in September or November last year. Fucking great. Just fucking great. This island is full of people that spread rumor and lies like it was free candy…wildfire!…but god damn if this shit has been said about me for the past year and I’m just now finding out.

I give official notice: I will never trust a single mother fucker on this island again. I will assume you are lying to my face. Expat or local, doesnt matter. If you see me smile then rest assured that I’m thinking of how nice it would be to see you at your own funeral. Fuck you.

I forgot about this…. when I was in the Makati Medical Center getting checked for this huge friggin’ cannon shot wound in my leg (ahem…) I weighed myself for the first time since I got here.

I lost 65 pounds in the past year! (That’s almost 30 kilos for you others))

I was a snug 50 inch waist. Now, a pair of 40 inch waist pants needs a belt to stop from falling down when I walk.

I woke up around noon today and promptly did nothing but some more laundry. Bleaching all the whites in the house that seem dingy after the house was empty for almost a month. Haven’t been shopping since I got back so I made some instant oats as food, not that I was hungry but I need it with my meds or I get indigestion really bad. Got a lotta paper crap I’m clearing out so rather than haul it up to the mainroad next week (only 1 day trash service) I put the unused hibachi standing grill on the back balcony and burned a bunch of it today.

Pretty much did that and puttered around on the internet until an hour ago when I got some daMarios and talked with Jaqi and Rod down at Red Pirates.The weather on boracay is really nice right now with a solid constant breeze comming off the sea.

I have no idea why, but this is the 3rd night in a row that ladyboys have been hanging out in Red Pirates at the bar. I guess it makes business sense for them since a lot of the older guys at Casa Camilla are into that sort of thing….but c’mon, no need for them to be hanging out on this end of the island so much! And especially not in there. It’s too small to accomodate that scene…its like a nippa hut version of Cheers. I dont mean to go on about this but, until now, I never realized how discreet and low-key the gays on this end of the beach are. There is nothing at all discreet about a ladyboy. I dont think I’ve ever seen them hang out in Angol before.  You want a partner of either of the sexes or transgendered (i think?) ladyboys…fine. Go to Summer Place or walk around Station 2 later in the night. Just want girls? They’re all over Station 1, Station 2, D’Mall, Cocomangas, Gilly’s, Andoks, Bamboo Lounge, Regency, or any friggin where you walk on the beachpath in that area… but down here at Red Pirates. Anywhere past Station 3 is not a good place for them to be hanging around. Luckily, this might be short lived since they seem to be getting picked up by the newer retirees as ’sowing their hedonistic oats’ in their early days here. Ok, I’m done with that.

now its past midnight and I never finished this post.  Been looking for a picture of a “bag of Andoks” online…they closed the one near here and opened another one further down the beach…not exactly close walking distance…still noy too far but definately not an option for a quick trip. The hole in my leg is still jacked up so I’m not moving about very much.

The Highlites that the article seems to spend a lot of time explaining:

• Resort properties on beaches will be declared ‘agricultural’ areas to put control back in Gov’t hands
• Supposedly, this protects occupants so they can finally put their name on the property by means of application
• Most resorts do not OWN the land but instead are subleased thru 2 or 3 different levels of people
• Owners (tax mapped) will have to pay the government AGAIN for the property they had been paying for over the last 30 years
• Because everything will be open again, and this is the philippines…pretty much anyone with the most money will see their application for ownership approved.

So…If you just invested 2 million Pesos in your building and several years left on your lease contract….you can lose it all if a new person comes along and has more money to offer the Government for the newly for-sale property. You will lose, your contract will become void. The new owner will have a nice turn-key resort business package.

the article and link are below here:

(more…)

I have no idea why this is considered a Top News item by Yahoo:

Filipinos among 55 arrested at a gay party in Saudi Arabia

Philippine Star -Thursday, July 31

Around 55 people were arrested by the police in Saudi Arabia at a gay party at a farm near Qatif in eastern Saudi Arabia.  The Arab News reported that among those arrested were Filipinos. The Philippine embassy’s labor attaché David Dicang confirmed the report.

“I know that some Filipinos have been arrested in that area and we are trying to help them,” Dicang said.

Dicang however could not comment on the nature of the case. “I can’t confirm or deny reports that are circulating in the media…I am working with the police to help the detained Filipino workers,” he said. — Alexa Villano/philstar

http://ph.news.yahoo.com/star/20080731/tph-saudi-arabia-gay-party-541dfb4.html

This happened as we were getting pulled over by the Manila traffic dudes for supposedly running a redlight. They were gonna shake the people down for a lot more but I guess it came down to 100 pesos when I stepped out of the truck. I was getting pissed and thats when I felt it. I thought it was just a muscle spaz and scratched at it later in the truck. Didnt know it was bleeding until I was going up the escalators. Luckily, I had my “white guy in the tropics sweat rag”.

Honestly, I’m beginning to think I took a .22 under the skin. There’s a knot that wont go away and its not under the puncture.

Just a quick note.

My leg looks like it was shot with a .22 pistol and got infected. Hell, it happened when I was 19 or 20, got shot with a .22 and didnt know it till later. Now its infected and swollen but the Doc says it’ll be fine and to stop walking on it.  Not easy to do living on this hillside.

I’m 2 weeks expired on my visa but its normally OK since they have instant service here on Boracay and have no problems collecting the 500 peso penalty. Never any issues as long as I’m not a toublemaker - but this time, they’re not coming back until the middle of next month by which time I will not only be a month expired, but also lacking a certain “1 year” special visa stamp. Breaking 2 laws at once might get me thrown in jail…damnit! How do they get away changing their immigration tourist visa requirements 3 times in less than a year with out telling anyone?

The landlord is going to be in a legal world of hurt soon. I know he’s going to ask me for rent even though they have 90,000 pesos of deposit already for the last 3 months rent. Its just about to be the last 3 months. They already lied to me once before about owing them money and trying to change the original contract. I know for a fact they have no money left over to EVER return that deposit. And thats the rub. Of course they’re gonna ask for more rent…but before I leave this country, I’ll put a few thousand US Dollars into a lawyers hands and tell him to bleed them dry. I would rather pay thousands more and have these people feel the hurt of being lying scammers, their kids without food, their electricity turned off, etc…than to just quietly keep my money.

I think someone was staying in the house..theres a ton of daMarios take-out containers and also Andoks rice in the frige. I have never, ever, bought Andoks rice. The place is trashed and my bed looks like someone was sloppily eating beef stew on it. God, I hope its a food stain and not bloody skidmarks. Actually, there are several fluit stains on my sheets - the white sheets I bleached to perfection the day before I left.

I have someone telling people that I owe them a bartab at a bar I never drink at.

Apparently the house flooded while we were gone. Godamn typhoon winds.

There are 3 bars of soap in my bathroom. I have never had 3 bars of soap at the same time. Never. Not even a spare still in the package. Only 2.

I’m back in Manila after a long bus ride and its been raining this afternoon. I was hanging out with some local friends and finally broke down to eat with my fingers….something I swore I would never do. These people are just way too cool and fun to be around. Lunch was BBQ whole fish, pork chops, rice, veggie mix, grilled eggplant, avocado slices, salted shrimp paste (didnt try), and…I think that was it. - served on 2 large banana palm leaves covering the table. I was the only one with a plate and fork/spoon. Everyone else plopped it down in front of them and dug in, so I did likewise (but with a plate still) with my fingers. I guess I was looking awkward because I was instructed on how to properly ‘push’ the food from hand to mouth - and that shit works!

I’ve always had this phobia of eating whole non-gutted fish with head, tail, skin, and scales on it. But honestly, its easy as hell. I enjoyed the whole lunch!

I asked why there were so many police check points along one section of road. The answer: New Peoples Army. Yup, the NPA was in the mountains to my left. The person described them as revolutionaries that went after corrupt government officials and business leaders. I’m not sure what I should read into that. They have support from within the military and police ranks yet are enough of a danger to have frequent vehicle check points.

There is certainly a difference between deluxe and the cheaper first class buses of Partas lines. Perhaps is due to the time of day, but first class is a step above chaos, a small step. Its not the bus itself but the operations.

The deluxe was 805p for a 7 hour trip from Manila to Vigan. Nice seats, kickin’ aircon, western movies, frequent stops for dropping off people and rest stops.

First class, on the other hand, is 200p cheaper. However, there is one HUGE flaw and that is they let these damn vendors on the bus at rest stops and seemingly random spots on the road. At the rest stops, u cant even get off for a snack or smoke before these annoying people start blocking the narrow isle hawking everything from peanuts to grapes to newspapers to something looking like a taco bell burrito that had been run over in the dirt (but was actually coconut based).

The ones that get on randomly, they dont seem to pay for traveling a few blocks or a few towns while standing in the isles leaning their butts on seated people.

I think we all know what i think about pushy vendors.

Some minor things would include the constant stopping all over the place for new old people like it was a city bus line while lacking all but two comfort stops for a trip thats now already into its 7th hour and only halfway there, mediocre aircon, lacking movies, and leaky ceiling.

To be fair, I should point out that the deluxe trip was late at night with no traffic. This one is middle of the day with traffic all over the country side.

(UPDATE: the trip was 10 and a half hours total)

I got a wild hair up my ass and headed to Manila. I dont really remember much about it but they said I arrived around 7pm. Audie invited me to stay with him in the Manila townhouse where we partied with Brian, Maffie, Jaqi, Gaz, Sai, Bukkit, Jay, Amirah and pretty much most of the Boracay gang. Yes, we drank a lot. Boracay must be dead right about now since theres no-one left to party there any more…..I wonder what they think about our remaining bar tabs.
Audie then invited a bunch of us to stay as guests of his generous family at Baluarte. Just google that name and the city of Vigan and you’ll see why I used the word ‘generous’. I havent been online in about a week and a half I think but finally found a spot outside where we can pick up wi-fi. ‘ll get on a little more now for pic uploading. I’ll post more later but left my good camera on Boracay so only a cell phone camera. For some reason, I didnt take many in Manila. The rest of the crew arrives today. Here’s a few pics.

Oh yea, I also got to see a lion gettin’ it on with a tiger - then he started playing rough and bit her neck (hell yea!) - she got up and he slapped her in the ass with his paw as she walked away. No shit. It was hilarious.

Gaz and Audie in the bell tower

Audie in his cousins bar

Baluarte house from below

The living room of the guest house

Looking down on the house from the new tower construction…thats th roof of the private house. Complete with 2 swimming pools and a couple of tigers. For a sense of scale, the path coming out of the patio is wide enough for 2 people to walk abreast. Its friggin huge.

Audie, Gaz, and Baya next to a callista (sp?)

Gaz and Sai in the pottery shack

Audie and JD striking a pose for the bell tower

Living room of the Manila townhouse

The crew in front of a really old church…. just waiting for lightening to strike us all down.

JD in the bell tower

Doris Gwendolyn Tate (16 January 1924 – 10 July 1992) was the mother of Sharon Tate. Sharon was the preggers chic that they killed at the house. It was this wealthy murder (and the bloody writing on the wall) that made the Manson Family stand out.

Anyhoo…’Tex’ went to jail for this and managed to have 4 kids thru conjugal visits - which Mama Tate didnt like. She was richer than rich and had the federal laws changed banning such visits.

bitch.