Homeless Diver

Almost came and sat right on top of us. Wind speed estimates were from 90 to 120 km/hr. I dont think anyone actually recorded it here in Boracay.

Apparently Fengshen means “God of Wind” in Chinese…which is odd and retarded at the same time. This wasn’t a Chinese storm and only hit Hong Kong after is settled down (as expected). And really, God of Wind? Yes, it was a lot of wind……thats normally the idea behind typhoons….its windy. I’m not knocking the Chinese, but how did they come up with this for the name? ahhhhhh….I found the answer:

http://www.pagasa.dost.gov.ph/genmet/rpnames.html and http://www.jma.go.jp/jma/jma-eng/jma-center/rsmc-hp-pub-eg/tyname.html

These names are preselected in advance and they just go down the list as the storms occur. I had not known this. The first list is for use within the Philippines only. I have no idea why they’re the only Asian country to be so obtuse about what they’re calling it - and theirs was “Frank”. Everyone else is all one the same list, which is the second link. If they had made it to 25 storms last year, the Philippines would have named it…hehe…. “ZigZag”. BWHAHAHHA!!!!! I love it, a typhoon named after rolling papers!

The main Asian list has words/names donated from most countries that touch the Pacific basin. Next one will be Kalmaegi meaning ‘Sea Gull’ donated by DRP Korea. but the USA has some entries I dont get…

I had to look this up…what the hell is a Chamorro? It seems they’re the natives of Guam. Apparently, theres a huge anti-american wave going thru there. I mean, look up their web sites…seems like they truly and utterly hate the Americans.  I dunno why we would submit their names, must’ve been a PR move.

Palau is not even an American territory, its independent.  How did the USA manage to submit those words under its name? Thats like Texas claiming a polar bear as its official animal.

Aere is Latin….and it does NOT mean storm, (that would be ‘tempest’). Its just a general Latin term for ‘air’. Oddly enough, I found a lot of references that it IS the Marshallese word for storm. What are the odds of a pacific native language having a word in general common with Latin?

“…the vessel carried 724 passengers, 111 crewmembers, and 26 sanitary aides.”

What is a sanitary aide? Is it a health care professional or a janitor? And why the term ‘aide’, are they not actually qualified in this field?  Who are they aiding, the crewmembers?  That would make 111 supervisors for 26 staffers..on a ferry that sank in Typhoon Fengshen.

I’m going to assume these are some form of health care people but it still leaves me wondering why the requirement to have so many and not even properly trained ones at that. 26 for only 800 people seems like a lot. Are they transporting a leper colony? Just how sickly are these passengers? Obviously they’re not regularly trained medical personnel or they would not be using the terms ’sanitary’ or ‘aide’. So we now have 26 people who generally can clean up human bio waste and generally keep it from like being the below-deck hold of a 1700’s slave ship. I think. Generally.

When I think of the term aide, I think of a subordinate staffer. But then again, whenever I think of the term sanitary, it’s always followed by the word ‘napkin’.

I’m not making light of this but it was odd to see this combination of words in an article about the Ferry search being halted because of toxic pesticides that werent ever supposed to be on a passenger boat:

A handful were positively identified by clothes, scars and jewellery [sic], including a policeman who was returning from Manila on the ferry after processing his retirement papers.

Wearing face-masks, relatives wept. Some fainted and vomited, at what they saw. One of the bodies, a female, was clutching a headless baby to her chest.

Across the street, music blared from karaoke bars.

Source

Sugar ants can predict typhoons - the recent invasion completely disappeared the morning before the typhoon hit Boracay. They came back at the end of the last rain and are back in force.

There is a former NASA engineer working as night-shift manager at a 24-hour bar in D’Mall….uh huh

Drunkenly walking thru a typhoon is easier than reporters make it look…either that or they’re drunk themselves.

NEVER take that large ‘emergency’ frozen bottle of water out of the freezer for longer than is necessary, it might make a difference between a little trash and a lot of rotten food.

Drunk Canadians with an accent like a drunk east Texan redneck should not be allowed in bars less than a kilometer from me.

Andoks is capable of closing; who would have thought.

Andoks does not need refrigeration: you will feel just as miserable the next morning regardless of refrigerator or not.

Solitaire by candle light sucks. It truly sucks. You cannot imagine how bad it wholly sucks.

Casual sex becomes “do you have a generator?”

Tokay geckos dont care if you just cleaned the house from top-to-bottom, they will crap huge nuggets whenever they please.

The ability to offer a clean-water shower can be traded for earthly sins.

Cocomangas never stops partying…ever.

The Baboy store will sell you tanduay in the middle of a typhoon…but only if he has a bottle left for himself.

Do not order any dishes with meat from a place that only uses generators at night time.

I can withstand being hit in the head, neck, and shoulders by flying coconuts. This is not bragging, but its still pretty damn interesting. Ok, yea its bragging.

The center of D’Mall is impervious to typhoon winds…possibly connected to the Bermuda Triangle

I am not the only person on this island that apologizes after pissing off people the night before.

The staff of Red Pirates are a dedicated bunch that let nothing stop the booze from flowing; even if that includes one of them standing on the thatch/nippa roof in sandblasting wind and rain to repair a few minor leaks.

Bags of trash are capable of levitating 200 meters and into other peoples houses.

It is possible to out-party people who have lived a party life for the last 5 years.

My neighbors do not need a 2-man-lift generator for basic sanitation, lights, fan, hotwater, cooking….no, they need it for a karaoke machine.

Having a spare and fully charged battery for the cell phone only matters when….when…. hell, it didnt matter. The service was out.

Sand can, and will, inform you of new body cracks it has found.

Rubbing alcohol is not a good way to clean the tabletop whilst using candles.

Check out the inner wall of the eye on Typhoon Fengshen (Frank)! This joker came right next to us that night my drunk ass was walking around the island! You can see the eye open up right at its peak intensity next to Boracay

EDIT: Because the embedded flash is causing the page to load really slowly, I put it under the  the page break. It will still be visible on the “more” page.

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UPDATE: whoops, not everyone had power restored like I had said earlier. I went down to Red Pirates and sure enough, they were still without. Several bars/resorts along the southern end of White Beach didnt have power still…guess I was lucky. As far as I can tell now, everyone seems to have it restored. Honestly, I have no idea why I have it or even internet considering all the cables are under the remaining fallen palm tree.

I was going to post this on Yahoo Answers but screw em…its mine!

Heres the scoop:

Cell phone: Globe came on this morning, Smart has been stable for the past day. “Sun” is still showing up in the networks although no-one knows what that is…possibly some private venture someone let out of the bag during the emergency.

Land lines: the land-line phones are PLDC and never went down as far as I can tell. I have heard them ringing in houses even when the power was off and no generators connected…dont ask me, I profess ignorance on how that happened.

Electricity: Went down sometime early friday am, came back yesterday (Tuesday) about 5pm. Many resorts have generators but it was obvious that fuel was getting in short supply after a few days so usage was rationed to foodservice areas and rooms at night.  Sometimes. A great many places have no form of generators like Red Pirates bar, but that did not stop it from being full of patrons until early in the morning. I do not have generator access either, it sucked.—UPDATE—Seems like several places did not have electricity. I just assumed I would be one of the last ones to get it restored. I noticed Red Pirated was still out lastnight and gave Joey and Jen a good ribbing about it…Sorry guys!

Beaches: water came high on all beaches. Tambaasan is where the boats went to drydock but the water came all the way to the palm line and smashed a lot to bits. one person died the first day by trying to line a boat when he was smashed between it and another. I can get some pictures of this and post them. All the resorts have done an excellent job of cleaning up their respective areas. Even the kids scrounging for recyclable stuff to sell have made a windfall of this.

My Balcony: I have been thinking of chopping down a few recently overgrown banana and coconut palms that grew to obstructing my view of the sea.  Now I don’t have to, the exact ones blew down!  I have my view back!

Fuel: was in low supply. Rationing was enacted voluntarily because people were afraid they couldnt get it. The only formal gas station, Shell, refused to sell to people with jugs knowing that it was resorts getting the fuel and not for motor transport.–UPDATE—several people told me this was not accurate. Others told me this happened to them personally. I can only assume it was hit-n-miss for different people.

Water - household: BWSS ( or whatever its called now) was out for several days. There are conspiracy stories going around about how they selectivly shut off water to all but the highest bidders…this will prove devistation if true. Right now, its just a rumor because certain high-end places DID keep water while residential areas were without (smaller resorts as well). The Tubi water system was only out for a day and then only to certain areas. It was really low pressure for a few days so we all filled every spare bucket and container we had. This is all speculation and I’m sure everyone will deny it happened either way.

Food: never an issue except for those clueless people like myself that had only an electric burner…not a gas tank burner. Cooking is kinda hard. But food was never in short supply and yes, the stores were always open. They did keep the doors closed but hey, its a friggin typhoon! Just knock!.

Booze: Never a shortage of that on Boracay.

Flooding: a few nights everything was flooded. D’Mall wetmarket was about 10 inches deep. Back alleys were much worse. Main road between Station 1 and 2 were so deep that motor bikes couldnt get thru at one point… the water was halfway between the wheel axle and the upper section of tire!  Some areas, you simply couldnt see the road, sidewalks, dirt, nothing…just where the water met the buildings.

Clubs: one night, everything along the beachside closed. I found out why - sandblasting wind and crap falling off palms left and right. It was physically impossible for me to see where I was walking. I HAD to put my hand infront of my eyes to keep the horizontal onslaught from hurting. Over and over, I would run into other drunks just as stupid as myself to be walking along White Beach in the middle of a typhoon just as the inner wall was near us at night.

Cocomangas - you guys are troopers! Never once did they stop partying and on top of that, made some SPECTACULAR pizza! John, Scott, Chico, Sean, and staff…..you guys know how to keep it alive!

AaaaHooo!!!!

5 Days now the power has been out on Boracay. The typhoon “Frank” (I know) came in as a mild warning on Friday…nothing special expected here and was supposed to peak around 2pm that day.

Whoops.

I have too much cleaning up to do now that the power and water are back on so I’ll post the details later. The house smells like mildew. The winds drove palm fragments/fronds all the way thru the house. Water made it from the back balcony, left turn, down the hall, right turn (and under a few doors), into the living room, onwards to the kitchen. The hillside smells like a huge urinal. Palm trees are down. Electrical and cable lines were down, some still are. I have no idea why I have internet because I can see my coax cable drooping almost to the ground under a fallen banana tree.

I had some good partying, and some bad decisions….but still enjoyed most of it. A bunch of boats were lost including the Blue Mango boat. They pulled it as high as possible to drydock, but the water came up even higher. I have video of one that broke free out front and crashed to bits a few minutes later on White beach…give me some time, I’ll post it online.

No more messenger from me, people. Only 6 or less people have commented on here but a bunch hit me up on messenger about my comments..not sure why but whatever. To each, their own.

Anyhoo, I start classes again today with the Univ of Phoenix so messenger will need to be cut to a minimum.  The weather is still hot here. Havent been diving in a week but I usually get down to swim in front of scuba libre in the afternoons. Still waiting on the house inspection info and zoning laws, (its a protected forest area).

Today is going to suck, simply suck. I started waking up around 2am to what I think was the sound of cats yowling. Guess I was so tired that I left the light on and thought I saw their shadows under the door….so I get up for water and turning the lights off. Between 2am and 5am, I drank every bottle of water I had including the jars -  thats about 4 liters. Started sweating in bed and then Montezuma’s Revenge kicked in. I’m trying to update the software on the phone but its telling me that its already current, even thou the numbers dont match up. Headache is comming on.

I’m beginning to believe that some people were never meant to be in hot weather. I cannot recall ever being sickly or ill in colder climates. I had energy in colder areas. I was active. And one thing is for certain, I never in my life put on this much weight until I got to Iraq. Being hot and in the sun almost seems painful and puts me in a bad mood. Its about time I left this area…..it might be cheap living but hell, thats not keeping me from being miserable.

Today, I finally got back in the water again! Whoo Hoo! I had taken my gear down to Blue Mango a few days ago to get it back in the rinse tanks and check it over… re-seasoning it I guess we could say.

We had some really good friends come in the same day and spent about 3 hours in the water tossing Frisbee; myself w/o any sunblock. Needless to say, I got burnt so that after dinner at Arwanas, I was not feeling chipper enough to go out with everyone else. The next day was an ‘aloe-vera and dark room’ day for me as well.

This morning, I rolled down about 07:30 am after a 3rd night of mild insomnia. Sure enough Dustin is rearing for some morning diving - and this mornings dive is Yapak 1. Sweeeet! That’s possibly the most advanced dive site around Boracay without everyone having tech rigs and getting into a specialized dive. You can drop in around 18 meters and slope down to the top of the cave at 33 meters (depending on which direction you’re coming from). Theres another guy who is on his 99th dive for this one, just the three of us.

Starting off, I noticed a bit of water in my 1st stage of the regulators (personal set) because I had apparently tightened the dust cap too tight. Just a few drops and airflow is still good, no biggie. We start heading to the boat and right away my BCD is full-bubbling out the shoulder dump-valve where I had not screwed it back on correctly; Dustin easily fixes this w/o gear removal. Now I’m at 2 strikes.

We head out and the weather is magnificent: warm water, visibility is excellent. We drop in North of the cave, which is a first for me…and the current had already started moving. We did a hard (for me) swim for a solid five minutes against and across the current to the cave - man, out of breath. I think I actually started sweating in my mask. We head down and I drop straight to 44.5 meters while my dive computer is chirping that it no longer want to be my friend during such a rapid descent. Silly Suunto hocky puck.

I look at my air and Holy Crap! I’m sitting at 60 Bar already! I have never in my life seen anyone use a 200 bar tank that fast. Damn, looks like I’m going to be the one ruining this dive to only a single penetration. Anyhoo, we head thru the cave and out the top, get on the boat, head back - and I start feeling queasy. Back at the shop, I have a bout of Montezuma’s revenge and head to the house for some meds and a nap (dive later in the afternoon).

I wake up at 13:30pm and the power is out again, it seems to have been out for a while as my bed is soaking wet in sweat. Cell phone rings and its University of Phoenix trying to get me back into classes earlier than I wanted. While talking, I stand up to find my left ankle is really tight and sore as hell. The pain is shooting up the outside of my left calve and feels like overexerted muscle, I was like where the heck did this come from?!?

So now I’ve got the trots, Brown-out just ended, bedroom smells like rank sweat, can’t walk properly, missed the afternoon dive, and have the embarrassment of ending a dive a lot faster than it should have. All because I went straight for a hard dive after all this time off.

But ya know what? I still enjoyed today. I feel much better; beat up for sure - but definitely better.

I awoke around 04:30 with a killer sinus problem. I slathered menthol-rub all over my face, neck, chest, around the ears…practically used it like I would if it were sunblock. I even put a dollop up each nostril, and learned thats not such a good idea.

Well, it went away after a while. Now it’s after 17:00 and the sinus issues are back. Just in time for anothe brown-out, so I’ll post this when the power comes back on.

Been really humid here on Boracay recently.  Oh, my head hurts.

Ya know, theres been so much drama this past week, I’m gonna turn off the SEO entry for this one. But sure enough, I’m still not going to list the details here. In the US, we call that “Pleading the 5th”. Or drinking a 5th….or something that somehow connects alcohol and legal issues…..

Well, the nice weather is gone and the sun came back out yesterday, after raining for almost a week. That creates humidity. OK class, all together now lets pronounce humidity….” DAYMN!” I can see how the different pronunciations might be confusing…in in the mother tongue of fat-crackerese, DAYMN! said loudly is a valid expression of painful humidity.

Lets see…

• I found out my cell phone is jacked up. It sends messages out to people not intended. The clicky sound for the camera also stopped.
• I have been drinking myself stupid recently, worse than normal and I hit black-out drive before 10pm last night.
• I used FaceBook to find a long-lost best friend I had back in the Army.
• I am single again and could sell my sheets to a sperm clinic.
• I found out that I can pack everything I need into 2 bags and a backpack…not bad considering my scuba stuff is in there too.
• I also found out that I can swim in stormy water at 05:30am using a mask with no strap.
• I got my visa renewed, late as usual.
• I found out that I have been here so long that they will not let me leave when I want. I am required to now pay 500 pesos for paperwork a week before and another 1400 pesos at the immigration office in the airport. So, if theres an impending death in the family, basically I’m screwed. Thanks for visiting the Philippines and spending more money than my family makes in a year!…oh and be sure to leave your wallet on the way out. Bye now!
• I have had the feeling of hair-in-the-back-of-my-throat for a solid week now.
• I shaved my head back down; sweating in that mop was not doing me any good.
• I accidentally sent a few hundred emails to people by mixing up the merge of gmail addy books and adding people to Yahoo messenger.
• I had a deep conversation with a guy who spent 5 months in a mental wing of Philippines prison last year…then agreed to have him teach me some diving specialties.
• I cleaned the house spotless last week; now it looks pretty unsanitary.
• I spent way too much money this past week.
• I am going stircrazy on this island. I dont want to dive. I don’t want to see the same people over and over. I dont like tourists anymore. Nothing blows up here. I need to get back to work just to have something to do.
• We have had more and more power outages.
• A big part of Boracay island was without water yesterday. Apparently one of the suppliers were low on supply so they sent people to sneak out and turn off the lines to certain areas so the ‘big guys’ could have water. Small businesses, residential, public…no water. Resorts and spas and anyplace with a swimming pool - lots of water. I watched the guys fan out to turn it back on later. They denied doing it even as about 20 of us watched them. While the denial words were coming out of their mouth, they were kicking sand back over the access cover so it wouldn’t look disturbed.
• I got heartburn last night for the 1st time in months.
• Got a sunburn on my head, neck, and shoulders.
• Looks like I’m losing weight again.

As I type this, leaning on my bed, I look around and cant stand the sight of the inside of this house anymore but really dont want to got be around any one else either. That means I have to wear clothes. On the brighter side, I have a new outlook on finding a better quality of female companion. Not that this will actually happen, but hey, its a start.

Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch….

I was doing much better this morning but now I almost wish I could hurl. Some salty soup didnt do the trick like it should have. Some pickle juice had me feeling better for a while and the body was responsive too but that was short lived. It didnt help that my lower back was killing me from the start. The only thing I was lifting was a foam mattress but I guess that did it.

And damnit! Why the hell does it smell like piss and milkfish all around the place! Urine oder is wafting around the hillside. The people downstairs are cooking with scrap construction wood again and the smoke is coming inside thru the balcony. Milkfish! I don’t know if thats what it is but Filipinos eat that stuff all the time and it smells like rotting flesh in a garbage dump. Cooked or raw, stinks to high hell. But they like it.

On the bright side, the stormy weather season is early this year! They call it “Habagat” which is when the winds change direction and start coming at us from the west. Even when the typhoons spin up and arrive from the eastern side, because of the rotation of them, the wind actually hits on this side of the island first - directly from the sea. This time, we are up on a hillside with two balconies facing the sea so this should be really sweet! And the wind!  Oh man, it’s gonna kick up and be almost constant for a long time meaning we can kill the aircon pretty much. I can’t wait! I just might jizz right now while typing!

Usually, its a pain to walk about the house with the heat. Soon the rain will start as well. Even though this place is impossible to shutter-up, it still has poor air-flow qualities. But now the wind will come directly thru the house! And much cooler too! weeeeeeeeeee!

Lets start from the beginning, around midnight or so. I was still sick and pissing from my arse. Ole girl was pissing me off with silly little stuff like making childish whining groans and saying “baybeeeee! I’mmmm sooo hungreeeeeey!” Couldnt opt for a simple “do we have something to eat?” or even “I’m hungry”. No, she has to do it in that so fucking annoying voice like a child wanting candy at the supermarket checkout line.

Then the power goes out from 01:00 until almost 03:00 am. No where even close to peak usage/consumption times. Sleep until around 17:00 in the afternoon. Get up and clean some more, going after the kitchen that time. Find a spider in the bag of carrots that I’ve been bitten by before. I really hate them - look mean and hurt like hell. Then an army of ants come out to eat him.

Shave my head again because this cracker just isnt doing so well in the heat these days. But for today, the weather was really nice. Opened the windows to let the wind in.

Our guest stops by and we had a good discussion about biology and genetic sequencing. Quite refreshing since it’s a rare treat on Boracay to have conversations about anything more complicated than sports on TV. Imagine the school geek being sent to a football/baseball summer camp. Thats me, here. I’m not saying that diving is anywhere close to being a ham-fisted knuckle-dragging sport like american football, but lets just leave it by saying that I really enjoyed the hell out of the conversation even when he was way over my head, (he’s a University Professor).

We had a few drinks, he sprite and coke~cola, myself coke/rum and a bottle of 2003 something white wine from Napa Valley. Started on hot-gluing the framework of a paper-mache’ lampshade project hobby of mine. Sealed a floater-jar as part of my personal artificial reef that I’m putting together without telling anyone. Its gonna be small and, erm, well odd. I guess it would more readily fall into an Art category. But by calling it an artificial reef addition, it becomes legal to put it where I intend on putting it. Screw it, if the Rotary club here can get away with dropping a bronze plaque of their chapters seal and call it reef restoration, then I’ll use their excuse too.

ole girl starts cooking a ton of bacon and ham while were talking and fills the kitchen with grease smoke. Talk about a non-cooking person. I cleaned the HELL out of the kitchen during this time. Manage to put a bloody fingerprint on the wall again. Drops of blood on the floor. Don’t know how I cut my finger so deeply.

This whole time, the weather is so nice that I’m not using the aircon and don’t really stand in front of the fan either. Apparently I told him that I would go snorkeling with him in the morning. He leaves around 2 or 3 or 4, I forget. By this time, I’m drunk and take off walking to get some cigarettes. Came back and for some reason, decided that it would be a good time to fry some ham slices, poach a few eggs in hot oil, slap it on a sammich with cheese, and grill the whole damn thing! I barely remember eating it. But my nicely clean kitchen? no more.

Its not enough that Boracay has a brown-out every day but now there are these weird power surges and drops. Down in the dive shop, appliances have been blowing up. In the house here we have gone through three extension cords, an external hard drive, a camera charger, two cell phone chargers, a soldering iron, a hot-glue gun, and a set of bed sheets. All destroyed from these power fluctuations. Well, the bed sheets were burned when a drop-then-surge caused an extension cord to catch fire on the corner of a bed.

There is one good thing though, well its not so much good as it is just a lack of bad weather. By bad weather, I mean ‘normal’ hot and humid weather here. I don’t know why Filipino travel sites extol the virtues of vacations here during the summer. They use terms like escape to Boracay during the sizzling hot summer days. I’m thinking..uh-huh, its more humid here than in the cities and much clearer skies (read: hotter). But recently, there has been a lack of hot weather…oh its still hot at times but we have been having daytime and nighttime storms and the coolness has been accumulating a little bit to where I don’t use the aircon for most of the night.

But anyway, back to the power surges. A surge is always bad but most modern appliances can handle it. Even computer cords. These, however, are drops in voltage then you can hear in your fans and air conditioners that it starts fluctuating up and down really fast and finally spikes upwards before settling down. Not good.

And another thing to complain about while I’m at it: this has been going on for years from what I’m told. Do they sell surge protectors here? Not a single one to be found! I went to the only electronics shop on Boracay and two of the three staff members didn’t even know what I was talking about. Very nice people, but not very electronics knowledgeable. (dont ask them for a 200 gig laptop drive with external enclosure, they don’t have a clue what youre talking about and will try selling you a desktop IDE model).

We just can’t seem to get enough of these power outages here on Boracay these days. This one was in the daytime just as the heat was ramping up. Mind you, I only have Air conditioning inside of a few bed-rooms so the bathrooms and everything else are not cooled. During this brown out, it was so hot that most of the water evaporated from two separate toilets in the house. I wasn’t feeling so good and spent the day sweating on top of towels on the bed but managed to venture out into the house a few times….man, it is a scorcher here! A few minutes is one thing, but this one was all morning into the noontime.

Hot! Steamy! Drains every last drop of energy from me. It should be a crime to advertise travel deals during this time of season.

It floors me that the Philippines cannot get its act together and provide the bare minimum power requirements for its most famous beach resort island … all this power consumption was known well in advance from all the construction going on here. Takes at least a year to build a resort.

This same brown out kicked the refrigerator into defrost, (which it needed anyway). I went into the kitchen tonight and saw the towel under my aircon unit but traced the flow under the table and over to the fridge, which had the drip tub in the back overflowing. Hmmm….the toilets evaporate but the water spread out over a hot tile floor doesn’t. Go figure.