Homeless Diver

Just a quick note.

My leg looks like it was shot with a .22 pistol and got infected. Hell, it happened when I was 19 or 20, got shot with a .22 and didnt know it till later. Now its infected and swollen but the Doc says it’ll be fine and to stop walking on it.  Not easy to do living on this hillside.

I’m 2 weeks expired on my visa but its normally OK since they have instant service here on Boracay and have no problems collecting the 500 peso penalty. Never any issues as long as I’m not a toublemaker - but this time, they’re not coming back until the middle of next month by which time I will not only be a month expired, but also lacking a certain “1 year” special visa stamp. Breaking 2 laws at once might get me thrown in jail…damnit! How do they get away changing their immigration tourist visa requirements 3 times in less than a year with out telling anyone?

The landlord is going to be in a legal world of hurt soon. I know he’s going to ask me for rent even though they have 90,000 pesos of deposit already for the last 3 months rent. Its just about to be the last 3 months. They already lied to me once before about owing them money and trying to change the original contract. I know for a fact they have no money left over to EVER return that deposit. And thats the rub. Of course they’re gonna ask for more rent…but before I leave this country, I’ll put a few thousand US Dollars into a lawyers hands and tell him to bleed them dry. I would rather pay thousands more and have these people feel the hurt of being lying scammers, their kids without food, their electricity turned off, etc…than to just quietly keep my money.

I think someone was staying in the house..theres a ton of daMarios take-out containers and also Andoks rice in the frige. I have never, ever, bought Andoks rice. The place is trashed and my bed looks like someone was sloppily eating beef stew on it. God, I hope its a food stain and not bloody skidmarks. Actually, there are several fluit stains on my sheets - the white sheets I bleached to perfection the day before I left.

I have someone telling people that I owe them a bartab at a bar I never drink at.

Apparently the house flooded while we were gone. Godamn typhoon winds.

There are 3 bars of soap in my bathroom. I have never had 3 bars of soap at the same time. Never. Not even a spare still in the package. Only 2.

I swear, I must have a new tapeworm because I’m friggin starving!

No joke, I am hungry as hell and I NEVER get hungry. I like to eat….a lot. I enjoy it possibly more than sex. I mean, I reaaaaaly like to eat. I can eat a lot at a single sitting but dont usually eat at single sittings (or in public for that matter). I tend to eat small dishes all day long and then a huge meal (in private) before passing out for the night. Thats me.

But I never get hungry. Never. Ever.

I can go a day or 2 without food and all is well, a bit of crankiness at most - but never hunger. Never that ‘empty stomach’ feeling or the growling. I had forgotten what its like until a few days ago. I was cooking some beef a week ago and all was good. Then 3 days ago, it was something labeled as pork tenderloin from BudgetMart. I dunno what it really is, but its always a safe and easy cook. I ate 2 of those with some chips and booze. Next morning, I was hungry so I cooked/ate another 2 throughout the day. Yesterday, jeeze I was hungry! So I ate a 12 inch daMarios pizza House (combo), 2 bags of chips, an order of fried calamaris, and half of one of their huge blocks of lasagna. It completely fills a take-out container.

At 8pm, I was hungry again damnit! So I had 4 BBQ skewers at Red Pirates (cooked to perfection by Rollhie).

And was hungry again at 2am when I was in Cocomangas and Gullies. I picked up 10 friggin pieces of fried chicken from Andoks. EWWWWWW…..ya, I know -nasty place. Unhealthy as hell but tastes good after a night of boozin’.

So this morning?  DAYMN I was starved! WTF?!?!? I ate more food in the last 3 nights than I usually eat in a week, but still have audible grumbles from my non-intestinal nether regions. What to do…..what to do…..oh, guess I’ll eat some of this leftover Andoks.

I’m not saying I have a tapeworm or anything, but hell, what is causing this? I have been losing weight though….