Homeless Diver

I woke up around noon today and promptly did nothing but some more laundry. Bleaching all the whites in the house that seem dingy after the house was empty for almost a month. Haven’t been shopping since I got back so I made some instant oats as food, not that I was hungry but I need it with my meds or I get indigestion really bad. Got a lotta paper crap I’m clearing out so rather than haul it up to the mainroad next week (only 1 day trash service) I put the unused hibachi standing grill on the back balcony and burned a bunch of it today.

Pretty much did that and puttered around on the internet until an hour ago when I got some daMarios and talked with Jaqi and Rod down at Red Pirates.The weather on boracay is really nice right now with a solid constant breeze comming off the sea.

I have no idea why, but this is the 3rd night in a row that ladyboys have been hanging out in Red Pirates at the bar. I guess it makes business sense for them since a lot of the older guys at Casa Camilla are into that sort of thing….but c’mon, no need for them to be hanging out on this end of the island so much! And especially not in there. It’s too small to accomodate that scene…its like a nippa hut version of Cheers. I dont mean to go on about this but, until now, I never realized how discreet and low-key the gays on this end of the beach are. There is nothing at all discreet about a ladyboy. I dont think I’ve ever seen them hang out in Angol before.  You want a partner of either of the sexes or transgendered (i think?) ladyboys…fine. Go to Summer Place or walk around Station 2 later in the night. Just want girls? They’re all over Station 1, Station 2, D’Mall, Cocomangas, Gilly’s, Andoks, Bamboo Lounge, Regency, or any friggin where you walk on the beachpath in that area… but down here at Red Pirates. Anywhere past Station 3 is not a good place for them to be hanging around. Luckily, this might be short lived since they seem to be getting picked up by the newer retirees as ’sowing their hedonistic oats’ in their early days here. Ok, I’m done with that.

now its past midnight and I never finished this post.  Been looking for a picture of a “bag of Andoks” online…they closed the one near here and opened another one further down the beach…not exactly close walking distance…still noy too far but definately not an option for a quick trip. The hole in my leg is still jacked up so I’m not moving about very much.

Sugar ants can predict typhoons - the recent invasion completely disappeared the morning before the typhoon hit Boracay. They came back at the end of the last rain and are back in force.

There is a former NASA engineer working as night-shift manager at a 24-hour bar in D’Mall….uh huh

Drunkenly walking thru a typhoon is easier than reporters make it look…either that or they’re drunk themselves.

NEVER take that large ‘emergency’ frozen bottle of water out of the freezer for longer than is necessary, it might make a difference between a little trash and a lot of rotten food.

Drunk Canadians with an accent like a drunk east Texan redneck should not be allowed in bars less than a kilometer from me.

Andoks is capable of closing; who would have thought.

Andoks does not need refrigeration: you will feel just as miserable the next morning regardless of refrigerator or not.

Solitaire by candle light sucks. It truly sucks. You cannot imagine how bad it wholly sucks.

Casual sex becomes “do you have a generator?”

Tokay geckos dont care if you just cleaned the house from top-to-bottom, they will crap huge nuggets whenever they please.

The ability to offer a clean-water shower can be traded for earthly sins.

Cocomangas never stops partying…ever.

The Baboy store will sell you tanduay in the middle of a typhoon…but only if he has a bottle left for himself.

Do not order any dishes with meat from a place that only uses generators at night time.

I can withstand being hit in the head, neck, and shoulders by flying coconuts. This is not bragging, but its still pretty damn interesting. Ok, yea its bragging.

The center of D’Mall is impervious to typhoon winds…possibly connected to the Bermuda Triangle

I am not the only person on this island that apologizes after pissing off people the night before.

The staff of Red Pirates are a dedicated bunch that let nothing stop the booze from flowing; even if that includes one of them standing on the thatch/nippa roof in sandblasting wind and rain to repair a few minor leaks.

Bags of trash are capable of levitating 200 meters and into other peoples houses.

It is possible to out-party people who have lived a party life for the last 5 years.

My neighbors do not need a 2-man-lift generator for basic sanitation, lights, fan, hotwater, cooking….no, they need it for a karaoke machine.

Having a spare and fully charged battery for the cell phone only matters when….when…. hell, it didnt matter. The service was out.

Sand can, and will, inform you of new body cracks it has found.

Rubbing alcohol is not a good way to clean the tabletop whilst using candles.

UPDATE: whoops, not everyone had power restored like I had said earlier. I went down to Red Pirates and sure enough, they were still without. Several bars/resorts along the southern end of White Beach didnt have power still…guess I was lucky. As far as I can tell now, everyone seems to have it restored. Honestly, I have no idea why I have it or even internet considering all the cables are under the remaining fallen palm tree.

I was going to post this on Yahoo Answers but screw em…its mine!

Heres the scoop:

Cell phone: Globe came on this morning, Smart has been stable for the past day. “Sun” is still showing up in the networks although no-one knows what that is…possibly some private venture someone let out of the bag during the emergency.

Land lines: the land-line phones are PLDC and never went down as far as I can tell. I have heard them ringing in houses even when the power was off and no generators connected…dont ask me, I profess ignorance on how that happened.

Electricity: Went down sometime early friday am, came back yesterday (Tuesday) about 5pm. Many resorts have generators but it was obvious that fuel was getting in short supply after a few days so usage was rationed to foodservice areas and rooms at night.  Sometimes. A great many places have no form of generators like Red Pirates bar, but that did not stop it from being full of patrons until early in the morning. I do not have generator access either, it sucked.—UPDATE—Seems like several places did not have electricity. I just assumed I would be one of the last ones to get it restored. I noticed Red Pirated was still out lastnight and gave Joey and Jen a good ribbing about it…Sorry guys!

Beaches: water came high on all beaches. Tambaasan is where the boats went to drydock but the water came all the way to the palm line and smashed a lot to bits. one person died the first day by trying to line a boat when he was smashed between it and another. I can get some pictures of this and post them. All the resorts have done an excellent job of cleaning up their respective areas. Even the kids scrounging for recyclable stuff to sell have made a windfall of this.

My Balcony: I have been thinking of chopping down a few recently overgrown banana and coconut palms that grew to obstructing my view of the sea.  Now I don’t have to, the exact ones blew down!  I have my view back!

Fuel: was in low supply. Rationing was enacted voluntarily because people were afraid they couldnt get it. The only formal gas station, Shell, refused to sell to people with jugs knowing that it was resorts getting the fuel and not for motor transport.–UPDATE—several people told me this was not accurate. Others told me this happened to them personally. I can only assume it was hit-n-miss for different people.

Water - household: BWSS ( or whatever its called now) was out for several days. There are conspiracy stories going around about how they selectivly shut off water to all but the highest bidders…this will prove devistation if true. Right now, its just a rumor because certain high-end places DID keep water while residential areas were without (smaller resorts as well). The Tubi water system was only out for a day and then only to certain areas. It was really low pressure for a few days so we all filled every spare bucket and container we had. This is all speculation and I’m sure everyone will deny it happened either way.

Food: never an issue except for those clueless people like myself that had only an electric burner…not a gas tank burner. Cooking is kinda hard. But food was never in short supply and yes, the stores were always open. They did keep the doors closed but hey, its a friggin typhoon! Just knock!.

Booze: Never a shortage of that on Boracay.

Flooding: a few nights everything was flooded. D’Mall wetmarket was about 10 inches deep. Back alleys were much worse. Main road between Station 1 and 2 were so deep that motor bikes couldnt get thru at one point… the water was halfway between the wheel axle and the upper section of tire!  Some areas, you simply couldnt see the road, sidewalks, dirt, nothing…just where the water met the buildings.

Clubs: one night, everything along the beachside closed. I found out why - sandblasting wind and crap falling off palms left and right. It was physically impossible for me to see where I was walking. I HAD to put my hand infront of my eyes to keep the horizontal onslaught from hurting. Over and over, I would run into other drunks just as stupid as myself to be walking along White Beach in the middle of a typhoon just as the inner wall was near us at night.

Cocomangas - you guys are troopers! Never once did they stop partying and on top of that, made some SPECTACULAR pizza! John, Scott, Chico, Sean, and staff…..you guys know how to keep it alive!