The Boracay Blackout Alliance isn’t about power outages or brownouts, it’s about the mysterious affliction whereby people suddenly do things for no other reason than it being out of their normal character. Normally this happens when alone; the fact that it’s often caught in public is a hint just how common this occurrence really is. [...]
Nothing says culture like communal hand ripping of animal flesh from the bone. Why bother with a plate to start with? I would shit a water buffalo if one of these people bothered to use that spoon or fork after lubing up with pig grease.
Ever had hard-boiled eggs numb your tongue like a taste of cocaine would? I went for a change in diet and boiled up a handfull of eggs from the sari sari store next to Red Pirates. Being drunk at the time, the numbness didn’t surprise me as much as it should have so I lost [...]
So my good buddy McCaw hails from Irish blood and is the only person I've met that can consistently drink as much as myself, day after day. He's been sitting in Manila for a while and kept talking about having the maid fix him tacos during drunken episodes. One day he makes drunk-food for lack [...]
Leaving Hostel 1632, I had forgotten, is a pain in the ass. You can spend hundreds of dollars there and they make you wait to check-out while they count the towels, mini bar, furniture, and ashtrays… it’s slow. And just like last time, they tried padding the minibar bill with items I didn’t use (and [...]
Global Warming has apparently changed the laws of physics in microwavable junk-food. The first line of directions for cooking a cup of microwavable EasyMac (Kraft©) says: REMOVE lid and Cheese Sauce Mix; set aside. (Note: You will see loose white powder in Pasta. This is necessary for proper cooking.) I’m a bit worried about the [...]
Ever get home and realize you left part of your groceries at the store? Its on the receipt but not on the counter. You search the bags and all over the fridge. Even the closet got an inspection, (you never know). In the car? Nope, don’t see em. But I’m remembering back to the store.. [...]
All I went for was a box of wine. Came home with:. jar of pickle slices dijon mustard gatorade powder chocolate milk, half gallon 2 frozen dinners bag of Totinos frozen pizza rolls 8-pack box of Yoplait yougert Vitamin E bottle roll of masking tape deoderant manicure scissors 2 feet of deli sandwich 20 pcs [...]
Yesterday was my first time eating crab and I definitely don’t like it. Apparently everyone else likes it for the same reason I don’t, that fatty tissue that makes up 90% of its meat. Don’t get me wrong, the cooks at Cocolocos are some of the best around so I have no doubt it was [...]
Yellow Cab Pizza isn’t American. The first USA franchise opened only seven (7) months ago, in Ohio of all places. It remains the only stateside location. Friday, January 16, 2009 WEST CHESTER — Calling a cab in West Chester Twp. has taken on a whole new meaning now that Yellow Cab Pizza Co. has arrived. [...]
Which is 3 more than I normally eat in a 24hr period. Insomnia had me out early and down at Blue Mango for breakfast, 2 eggs however you want them, wheat bread toast, bacon (or ham slice), and mango jam & butter. Wow, breakfast…. me….who would have thought?! A few hours later I got the [...]
In a revolutionary marketing move, Andoks is offsetting the unhealthy nutrition image of the menu by introducing brand-name pharmacies. Or possibly it’s meant for employees? If you look to the left, you’ll see they also seem to be the owners of the Obama Bar & Grill.
The night started simply enough being alone with myself, but ended with obscene quantities of tequila and tacos. I don’t have a single picture: which is probably for the best. No need for evidence. Was planing on doing some coding so I got some take-out from Cocolocos: sliced beef w/vegetables, sliced chicken in bamboo shoots, [...]
I swear, this has gotta beat a 3am stoned munchie moment, alcohol fueled: whole-wheat bread loaf, gotta slice it miracle whip mustard frozen mixed veggie pieces that never cooked to softness Tuna in oil… really greasy, nasty, oily vegetable oil. As in lube your intestines type oil. (Century Tuna) oregano salt pepper over-sweetened (almost nasty) [...]
*****UPDATE****** To whom it may concern, thanks for the crank-call delivery order from da’Marios. (proof they know me well already, hehe) That 450 pesos that Boracay Tourist Center turned down? I got it done and sent registered mail at the post for 300p. whoops, your bad. Even the longtime postmaster was like ‘huh, why wouldn’t [...]
I have a problem with Yellow Cab Pizza here on Boracay. Recently, they deliver only when they feel like it. I can remember many times that I’ve called and their delivery times have magically changed to be 15 minutes prior to my ordering. Lets be clear, its different times – tonight was 10:15pm. A few [...]
I dunno, I was doing just fine last night, up late till about 02:30 (as usual) then outta no-where, there was the urge to discharge a gloriously hearty fountain of vodka, cranberry juice, and ravioli. It was a beautiful sight! I cold hear the growl of a pirates lost soul. Graalfwlfwl!!!!!!!!!! I was drinking just [...]
I spent most of yesterday making a pot of beans. Soaked overnight and slow cooked all day with my secret seasonings and certain veggies (which aint easy to find here). oh man, it was a nice day so the windows were open, people stopping by to ask what smelled so good. Somehow, I got fairly [...]
Ok… OK….. Ok…. this is simply retarded. This is an open admission of “Hello world, we dont have any standards of sanitation, food quality, or even product tracking – but rest assured, we’re pretty good at cross contamination!” There is a list of ingredients on a package of Knorr Cream of Corn soup powder; it [...]
I remember once weighing the size/weight/quality against the other places and Yellow Cab came out much better. Yes, its pricey but it was also a lot of food. Normally, I can easily eat 600 pesos of daMario for a 12″ pizza, order of fried calamaris, and a huge slab of lasagna. But ordering from Yellow [...]
I think we all know what happens when I eat prawns in the Philippines – the sensitive term would be ‘Montezuma’s Revenge’. Another phrase would be ‘ the 2-day food poisoning with projectile vomiting and explosive diarrhea’. Something like this: But lately, I’ve been on this ‘prawn cracker’ phase. Even though the bag smells nasty [...]
Check this out, a one of those small single serving bags of chips like you get in vending machines. I just opened it – there’s only like 8 pieces in it! Bag sure felt full earlier…well, as full as normal. BTW, their site is www.oishi.com.ph
Longanisa is a Filipino pork sausage, in links normally. It might be pretty unhealthy, but when cooked right, its possibly the tastiest sausage around. Done properly, you end up with a very sweet juicy meat and a sweet thick glaze on the outside. Its usually in shorter segments than western sausages and includes bits of [...]
I wasn’t planning on going out, didn’t even really feel like socializing. Several people told me a bout a birthday party at Red Pirates but I declined and went home for a few rum/cokes and quality time on the computer doing tax paperwork. At some point, I decided to cook about a dozen hotdogs, those [...]
In their drive to be recognized as societal contemporaries on the international scene, the Philippines restaurant outlet, Jammers, on Boracay has taken it upon themselves to redefine the “taco”. Not in a ‘Taco Bell with cute names and mystery brown/red sauce’ kind of way, but more of a ‘remove the taco shell and and make [...]
Recent Comments