The very day after Chad leaves, I started by having a single drink at home and visiting Blue Mango where I had two more drinks and a large quesedilla over the next few hours. Had the bag with Chads and my diving gear sitting nearby.

Current total: 3 drinks and a decent meal over 5 hours. Still sober. Clear memories up to this point. All-day brownout still in effect.

Next is Cocoloco’s and its blurry. I cannot recall having drinks, sitting on the stool or bench, talking to anyone, or havoing the backpack. The only memories are of a pizza in front of me and a certain view: I was in the front about where the benches and stools meet and I looked to see Jo-Ann sitting at the stairway table with that strange smiling guy that was trying to barfine her the night before. I remember that view clearly and thinking… wow… they pimped out one of the staff?

Time: 21:00 and sober back in the room, unpacking the scuba gear. I remember this clearly, thinking I had just come from Blue Mango…. The whole Cocoloco event wouldnt be remembered for a couple days.

Feeling sober, I tripped to Sundown for some finer snack food like good cheese, salami, imported drinks. Stopped on the way back for a single drink at Red Pirates and had a conversation with Rose Ann about her other job – I clearly remember these events and being sober enough to feel slightly bored (which is really sober for me). Brownout ended and I brought the groceries home.

Time: 21:45 and damnit, I forgot eggs! Drinks: 6ish I’m assuming a couple at cocoloco for the tally. I remember being clearheaded. After getting sari store eggs, I stop at Island Staff dive shop for a few drinks with some friends. Acos makes a great spanish omlette with the offerings. He does it pulutan – appetizer fingerfood style.

Time: 23:00 got my good drank on now baby! Group splits, I return home.
Whoops, I need to get phone load for tonight…. Get it…. Stop next door at the Cowboy-something bar and…
… And yup, there it goes blurry again. I clearly remember the ending and departing, but none of my stay at the cowboy although I clearly remember only having a single drink.

Time: 12:00 – midnight. Drinks: 10 or less, not even up to snuff for my daylong average. Woke up angry and fitful.
There I was, having a lite week, staying generally sober – but nooooo, someones god had an attack of “lets fuck with JD”.
You hear me Universe?!? I fucking WIN! You suck, now go cause miscarriages in breeder 3rd world countries or something else useful… we saw what you did in Haiti, thats a good start, little low on the body count but its a good start.

Around noon, I realized what day it was and headed down to sip-n-grip some purple drank! a.k.a. anything with alcohol. The only plan was to make the rounds, Jammers and all. Starting with a few Piña Colada’s from Blue Mango but there wasn’t anyone about, not even strangers to drink with next door at Cocolocos. Clearly, this end of the beach was drop-dead-empty. Not a soul in the restos, on the beach, or it the pathway. Moving down the beach to Red Pirates, there were some French Canadians engaged in getting their drank on. Mai Tai’s yea, that sounds good! Jen, Don, Canadian, friends who’s name escapes me, and another dude that said he was American but sounded British Royalty. People came, people went. Apparently, I never made it up the beach to Station 2 & 1.

Don’t really remember leaving, but at least the morning light didn’t reveal any chicken wings stuck to the wall this time.

Didn’t really drink much, not even a liter of rum…  wtf, there’s a rotisserie chicken in the microwave! Where the hell did I get a rotisserie chicken in the middle of the night?!? And how the hell did water get inside the bag of expensive organic multi-grain bread? …. oh god … please let that be water….

Was planing on doing some coding so I got some take-out from Cocolocos: sliced beef w/vegetables, sliced chicken in bamboo shoots, and a small container of fries. Got home and assumed the prone position. Three hours and a bottle of rum later, half the food is already gone and I headed to Red Pirates.

I started with a few drinks for that back pain, ya know, daddys medicine. Then a local personality started dancing for us and Rod was gracious enough to get it on camera. There’s distinction between dancing and falling down, but we’ll not bother with that. A martial arts guy from Iloilo started digging into my backs pressure points which was cool. At Midnight, we hit Joey’s birthday and more drinks were flowing.

I actually rang the bell… for tequila and sambuca, and god knows what else. Then Jesse had some flaming drink he wanted us all to try, over and over. Many straws were melted. That part of the bar needs re-varnishing. I remember calling everyone the wrong name but only a few people noticed.

After leaving around 3:30, a couple girls looked at me and took off in a sprint up the hill… no idea. Made it to Jammers and ordered take-out of 12 tacos, 2 b’fast burgers, and 4 chicken burgers. Waiting, I struck up a conversation with an ex-girlfriend until a guy sat down and I realized she wasn’t my ex. At home, there were a few more drinks and 4 mango’s and the rest of Cocolocos food – I’d forgotten about the massive Jammer’s order sitting between me and the TV.

Woke up to find a brownout and all the food gone. If theres one thing that Boracay is never short of, its nightlife.

Made a 2,000 peso order for tacos at Jammers and being about 300p short, handed the money over then took a motorcycle home for more cash, forgot about Jammers and went straight to Cocomangas. Several people said I was at Gilly’s around 3:30^am dancing with the girls from Tony’s Loon Sunset Bar and buying tequila for everyone… which would explain where all my cash went.

I have no memory of getting home but the bed was filled with sand, a pile of salt on the floor, the aluminum baseball bat was in the bed (wtf?), a huge bag of Andoks with about 30 pieces fried chicken, 5 pork chops, and a huge chunk of liempo (pork belly)… sitting on the nightstand. Crumbs all over the floor and a plate of bones. Two empty bottles of rum; the remote control had been thrown against the wall till it popped apart. When I left, that large spike was in my eyebrow…. now there’s a small barbell.

And a chicken wing… you know the tip of a chicken wing, the pointy part nobody eats? Yea… well, there was one stuck to the wall. I felt too bad to  get up and mess with it – woke up a few hours later, it was gone.

And what can possibly top all that?  The all day/night brownout  for the hangover!

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• whole-wheat bread loaf, gotta slice it
• miracle whip
• mustard
• frozen mixed veggie pieces that never cooked to softness
• Tuna in oil… really greasy, nasty, oily vegetable oil. As in lube your intestines type oil. (Century Tuna)
• oregano
• salt
• pepper
• over-sweetened (almost nasty) spaghetti sauce
• hard boiled egg sliced on the Y axis

it makes a sammich. a smelly sammich.

I was drinking just enough to feel good, tons of good movies on the tube, got in-depth on repairing some lighters from spare parts (I like the hobby),…. just generally a good night. I had this big rusted can of ravioli from SunDown that I bought just because it was too rusted to see the expiry date. Cooked it and man was it good. I mean really good. Made some hors d’oeuvres from Hungarian sausage with Gruyère cheese melted on top.

Spent some time cleaning and lubricating my tools with heated oil, house is clean as hell and rearranged to maximize space, feng shui almost.  Even though the daytime sucked, last night was really working for me. I was truly enjoying myself.

Then the ghostly pirate decided to be heard. I think he added some ethereal ectoplasm or whatnot because the volume was quite large. Something akin to the entire buffet of a KBR Thanksgiving. But all in all, I felt fine afterwards and woke around noon today (after the brownout) feeling strangle refreshed.

Thats about all I remember. I woke up when the brownout started at 8am. The girl (never got her name) said we met and ate tacos at Jammers and brought another 2 cartons home with some burgers. (??).

Ok, so now were in a daylong brownout on Boracay.  I keep using those terms togather because if there’s every a single thing I remember about Boracay, the countries crown-jewel of tourism, it will be all the brownouts.

• Another brownout on Boracay.
• My lower back is thrown out (which I suspect is the other parties fault),
• theres a hole in my foot (dont know how I was walking around),
• not much breeze,
• ate the leftover tacos and got sick (should’ve refrigerated em’)
• internet is spotty after the brownout ends in the evening
• and – hold on– ANOTHER BROWNOUT that lasts until 8am this morning!

• 10:30 am – Yesterday (after being up since midnight) I went to Tony’s for a chat with Denis and beer.
  
• 11:30 am -  Paulina shows up and somehow we got on the topic of Exit bar – must’ve been the booze ’cause I launched into a loud rant about how much I hate the shit out of that place.
• 12:00 noon – burger to-go from Tony’s (good food and good prices).
• 14:00 to 19:00 – wtf?!? the shits, again?
• 19:30 - ‘stupid’ (aka: wifey) stops by because she hates her new neighbors (that she had to get after I kicked her out). I get a free 30 minute head/neck/shoulder massage, she gets to watch some TV.
  
• 20:00 – Red Pirates only has 2 customers that are looking distinctly nervous and dork-touristy. Ann came back for a visit and is looking smoking hot sexy; ideas form. I’m drunk as hell and tell her so. I didn’t get any.
• 20:30 ish – It dawned on my this would be a perfect time to visit Dustin in the Blue Mango diveshop and discuss Tech diving. I took out an eyebrow piercing and put it back in. Don’t remember what was discussed but I remember agreeing to something.
  
• ? – Cocolocos. I’m pretty sure there were more drinks there. A visitor was looking at me strangely, perhaps I shouldn’t have sat in the barstool directly next to him with the towel draped over the back – when the rest of the bar front was empty.
• At some point, the guys in front of Island Staff diveshop asked me if I was OK.
• bed. don’t know when. don’t know how. but I wokeup in my own bed.

Maybe its just  a hangover.

Woke up around 4pm. Hung out at Red Pirates for a while

• B: B calls saying that him and M would be arriving in 30 minutes and I should stay….
• me: well, you see I haven’t eaten yet today so I’m leaving now. Might be back later.
• B+M: They both say to stay— haven’t seen them in a long time
• me: I agree.

2 hours later and they’re still a no-show. I leave to eat a boiled egg, some cheese/crackers and a grape Gatorade…. but oh, they call 30 minutes later… “come drinking, we’re here!”

I do. San Mig Lite and tequila shots. Quite a number of shots, I even bought a few rounds. Fast forward–> Gatorade decides to stand-up and take a bow. End of the night. buh-bye.